August 21, 2012


I'm not sure what is more torturous; being confined to a hospital bed indefinitely or being forced to watch Japanese anime cartoon reruns in Spanish.  I'm thinking the latter.

My little, round, Ecuadorian roommate delivered last night.  She had been having contractions throughout the afternoon and by merienda they whisked her away.  Her baby, a girl, was born by cesarian and from what I've picked up from the nurses, is now resting and growing in the NICU. 

I miss my Ecuadorian mamacita.  She was nice.  I wonder if they put us together based on our immigration status?  Probably not, but it seems that way sometimes.  It's tough to be the Americana on the ward.  I'm like the freak show at the circus; patients, visitors, even nurses & orderlies walk slowly by my room and stare in at me.  I should resurrect a turnstile and charge just for rubbernecking.  It's like they've all got money on the foreign girl to break down and start rubbing fecal matter into her hair or do something equally revolting.  I'm different and I get that.  Still, it's no fun to be the odd man out, especially when you're stuck trying to translate the game rules mid-play.

My new roommate moved in with her mom late last night.  She's a twenty-something with rotten ovaries.  They abandoned their room down the hall in hopes of finding peace and sanitation with me, The Circus Freak.  Apparently, her lottery draw was not so fortunate as she got stuck in a room with a family of heavy smokers.  Not all that big of a deal since smoking is prohibited in and around hospital grounds...until they decided that getting their fix was best done in the shared hospital room bathroom.  Me?  I would've pulled out my numb chucks and gone all Bruce Lee on their asses but the Spanish are much more couth, more European, more Coco Channel.  She asked for a transfer of room, was granted it and is now buddied up with me until her discharge which will inevitably be before mine. 

My feet are up and my diaper moist but snug.  Alas, another day to grow a baby and some rhoids.  I think I'll kill a few hours and contemplate that fecal mask afterall.  But only after the brushing up on my kanji.  There is afterall, a buttload of zitless teen anime warriors to keep track of.

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