FAIRy TALEs

Spring has officially sprung.  I know this because the rose bushes that line the pueblo streets are in full bloom.  The walk to school with the kids takes twice as long because trying to take it one step past talking the talk, I have somehow brainwashed my own kids into believing that "Stop to smell the roses," means you must smell every single one of them. 


But we're not all about fragrant flora here in Andalucia.  Even those who have never set foot on the Iberian Peninsula are familiar with the springtime rite that is Feria.  Oh, so you think I'm mistaken.  Not so, my friend.  Not so at all.  Feria means fair.  Fair as in party til the wee hours of twilight, eat your weight in food so good you'd swear it was illegal, and dance until your toes fall off.  And the fair of all fairs happened last week in Seville.  Dating back over 150 years, the week long annual festivities were originally intended as a livestock fair but eventually evolved into what it is today.  Sound familiar, state fairgoers? 
Come on, let's take compare...

RULE #1: QUICK, FRY THE FOOD.  ALL OF IT.

Pesca'ito frito. Translation: Fried Fish.

Long John Silver's has nothin' on this shit.



In Iowa, we fry everything. 
And yes, I do mean EVERYTHING.



What Spaniard doesn't love sardines?  Oooh, they
stink so good!  Removing the heads is apparently
optional.  Charlie prefers his with-something about

the crunch of the eyeballs.

RULE 2:  DRESS TO IMPRESS                 

                                                   





Go on, Girl!  Sink your teeth deep

into that fried stick of butter. Mmm.

Nothin' like a coronary on a stick!



                  



                           


It's all about the accessories.  Every woman will have a giant

flower pinned somewhere on her head.  Fans, bracelets

& matching earrings are also a must.  FYI, cleavage is (not?)

optional.

It's not every day that the fair comes to town.  In Spain, fashion is very important and I might even argue too important.  Take a peek at some of the best dressed from this year (Seville) and last year (Iowa).



La gitana dress is a staple.  Lots

of bright colors.  Lots of ruffles.

And lots of dangerous curves.




Aaaw.  This Iowa couple chose to color coordinate.  It's like

loss prevention for adults.  'Have you seen my husband? 

He's got a purple tee shirt and a drumstick the size of my thigh.'

Even the men aren't afraid to

show a little skin in Iowa. 

Here we get the pleasure of this

man's back cleavage.  Yummy!



RULE #3: BEWARE.  FAIR HAIR.

I'll make this short. Hair is a serious part of fair couture no matter where you are. As the lone short haired blonde (though I now think of myself as brunette in spite of what the rest of the pueblo says), I am The Minority when it comes to fair hair. At least by Spanish standards. Take a look at the do's and take note. 

Meet contestant # 7 from the Iowa State Fair's

mullet contest. Business in the front.  Rock

& Roll in the back.  Sassssssy, isn't he?

The gal on the right has a lot going on.  Rose dead

center accented by Olivia Newton John Headband

style braid punctuated by big ass bun.  This is why

I have short/no hair.  But it's pretty, isn't it?



The Spanish peineta.  It sits proudly tucked into the back

of every Spanish girl's bun.  Some are tall.  Some are short.

Some are sparkly.  Some are plain.  Personally, I think Mr.

Iowa State Fair  (see above photo) would take first prize

with one of these tucked into his mullet, don't you?

So there you have it, the best of both worlds.  Though you missed the April fair in Seville by a week, don't worry, there's always the Iowa State Fair in August.  If you decide to brave it, be sure to represent and tell 'em Pickle sent ya.  Oh yeah, don't forget to say hi to the giant butter cow.